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To you it may seem reasonable, a matter of self-preservation. If you let someone’s herpes define who they are as a person and the role they will or won’t play in your life, you have reduced them to their STI status alone.And here’s the thing: there’s nothing wrong with asking yourself, or asking Google, if you should date someone with herpes.It’s human nature to think it, and to wonder, and to actively make the decision. But in asking me this question, an actual person with herpes, you are shaming and insulting me in the name of needing help deciding.I don’t want to be the selfless Mother Teresa of herpes.My first outbreak was quite painful because it coincided with an infected spider bite, but now I show symptoms so rarely that I pose no credible risk to my partners 99% of the time.In retrospect, if my ex-boyfriend had known he had herpes and told me before we started dating, I wouldn’t have done anything differently, and I would still have herpes today.
How did my partners after my diagnosis make the decision of whether or not to sleep with me? But mostly they looked at me, and thought about the fun, challenging conversations we had, and remembered how gorgeous my thick hair is.And I still do think that if you have a valid health condition that herpes would complicate, you’re a gentleman and a scholar and I wish you the best of luck.But too often my impulse to capitulate to people who stems from a desire to seem chill. At the end of the day, STI stigma is a form of prejudice.We created this site exclusively for people who have Herpes, HPV or HIV.If you are living with Herpes (hsv-1, hsv-2), HPV or HIV, you can now join for free and have an amazing time.
A true partner, a true best friend, accepts all of you.