Dating a widower problems
They were unwilling to swap these benefits for companionship plus the possibility of becoming caretakers later on.
Another issue is that widowers often lack the close friendships common among women, relationships that can help them buffer the loneliness of loss.
Since the launch of just over 20 years ago, online sites and mobile apps for dating have gained freight train-like momentum, providing millions of singletons worldwide with an easy way to connect with new potential love interests.
However, there's no doubt that everyone comes with his or her fair share of emotional baggage, the weight of which differs depending on the individual.
In the book, "Dating a Widower" (Ben Lomond Press, .99) Abel Keogh discusses this topic as an expert.
After all, he was widowed nearly 10 years ago and has since remarried.
About 600,000 people lose their spouses every year, but only 200,000 (one-third) are men.
A second widower in another state takes classes that interest him at a local college and spends a great deal of time with children and grandchildren.
"The widow or widower is either ready to move on or they're not.
You're not asking them to forget their memories, you're simply asking whether they are ready to start a new relationship and take the next step in their life.
Dating is tricky enough as it is, but dating a widower has even more possible pitfalls.
Women may wonder if the issues that may arise are grief-driven or simply problems that the widower is struggling with. To make the experience as smooth as possible, he suggests: Women who date widowers should never feel like they're being compared or held up against the late wife.
These findings help explain why some older widowers I know have carved out lives for themselves without the slightest interest in dating or remarriage.