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Sometimes, I do wonder what I’ve done right to deserve someone as amazing as Princess in my life.Note: This was originally published as a chapter in the book “GAP: Autism, happiness and wellbeing” (British Institute of Learning Disabilities).It’s especially worse if they aren’t actually diagnosed with it yet, which means that they aren’t even aware that they’re different, and unless you are a qualified professional, you have no business playing psychologist for them and lampshading their difference. Every single time I would mention that she’s an aspie, Princess would promptly punch my arm or scratch me.That’s how she copes with it, and soon enough, I knew better than to bring it up.An aspie tends to have a lot of personality quirks that leads them to feel that relationships are futile.These numerous difficulties make them generally pessimistic about their prospects in a romantic relationship, and given their logical but very linear mindset, a breakup is of no great consequence to them, so it’s easy for them to move on.
Writing even once a week is taxing my limited communication resources and as much as I’ll miss this, self-care has to be a priority for me right now. At age 42, I was happily married, the parent of a grown daughter, and a successful business owner.Our friends happily obliged, as they texted her throughout the day.When I called her later that day, she complained about the fact that a lot of people have her number now. They can manage just fine without us reminding them that they’re different.In fact, if anything, the realization of how closely alike they are to people without Asperger’s makes the few but glaring differences all the more difficult to overcome.I won’t pretend to be an expert on Asperger’s, but suffice it to say that I have dated someone who has it.
Because it defies easy-to-follow logic, aspies don’t really understand the big idea of romance—but then, who does? ^______^There was no lingering anger or jealousy once she realized there was no logical reason to be jealous. I think this speaks for itself, but to elaborate, innuendo, the kind that’s not necessarily sexual, doesn’t go well with them because they take your words only at face value. When I got full, she refused to stop feeding me, and she got so annoyed she poked me pretty hard with the fork and I started bleeding.